top of page
Writer's pictureTheodore Kodogo

Our Toxic Pursuit of Growth



Today the self-care industry has grown and increased in popularity within our society, we are constantly bombarded with messages urging us to improve and strive for perfection. Whether it's in our careers, relationships, or personal lives, the pressure to be better, achieve more, and excel in all areas. It can become inevitably overwhelming. We need to, it's important to strike a balance between personal growth and self-acceptance. Self-Care itself can be a little toxic, especially when we urge ourselves to purse perfection or never take moments to be grateful for the person you have become.

The desire for personal growth and self-improvement is natural and can be a catalyst for positive change. It motivates us to set goals, learn new skills, and expand our horizons – to unravel depths within us we never knew existed or reach heights way too high to reach. We do however become a little too obsessed with the whole idea of an IDEAL STUDENT or CHILD or ATHELETE or whatever you want to be. Growth is a lifelong journey, and it's essential to embrace the process rather than fixating solely on the end result.



Another big problem is when we are in constant competition with the people around us, be it with academics or sports. While striving for excellence can be beneficial, an excessive focus on perfectionism can be detrimental to our well-being, especially when we are in this obsessive state always comparing ourselves to other people and their life journey. The pressure to constantly improve can lead to feelings of inadequacy, self-criticism, and burnout. Recognize that perfection is unattainable and that embracing our imperfections is an integral part of self-acceptance and genuine growth. Our journeys are as unique as they are the same, we are different people, different packages, so tell me how do you expect the end product to be the same, it won’t because we are different.

Self-compassion is a powerful antidote to the pressure of constant improvement. Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, acknowledging that you are human and prone to mistakes. Embrace self-compassion as a way to nurture your well-being, finding balance between self-improvement and self-acceptance. Compare yourself to your past self not the person beside you. Your journeys are not only different but experiences too, they haven’t walked a mile in your shoes and you haven’t in theirs so don’t be so hard on yourself.


Challenge societal notions of success and define what it means to you personally. Reflect on your values, passions, and aspirations, and align your goals accordingly. Remember that success is subjective and can encompass various aspects of your life beyond external achievements. By embracing your unique path, you can ease the pressure to conform and focus on what truly matters to you. You should strive to be better and not necessarily the best. Embrace challenges as chances to grow, view setbacks as valuable lessons, and acknowledge that effort and perseverance are key ingredients in the journey toward self-improvement.

While personal growth and improvement are valuable pursuits, it's essential to navigate the pressure to constantly improve with a healthy perspective. Embrace the journey of growth, set realistic expectations, and prioritize self-compassion and well-being. Remember, true growth is a balance between striving for improvement and accepting ourselves as we are. We need to learn to find harmony on our position on this journey of self-improvement gain a serene state self-acceptance, we need to honor our unique journeys and allow ourselves to thrive authentically.

Recent Posts

See All
bottom of page